The Year of Living Bravely: Part 1

I thought it began with "Andrew." I thought the thrill of a secret and passionate physical relationship was the first chapter in my year of Living Bravely; I was wrong, it was only the gunshot at the starting line.

Being with Andrew was an adventure, but it was one I've experienced a good five times, and I think that's enough. What he offered was a new perspective: honesty within a hopeless relationship made me a little more hopeful for those to come after it. He, as it turns out, is just as full of shit as anyone else, but I don't begrudge him that. Every person has the right to be full of shit because we don't know anything. Acknowledging that you don't have all the answers right now is the first step to finding those answers. Which brings me to the first milestone in my Living Bravely adventure: Deconstructing the F-Word.

Last year, my service organization held a panel in which four professors (all women) discussed the implications of being a feminist within the academic world. Although I loved hearing what they had to say, the event was not completely successful; the speakers had no guidlines, no concrete issues to discuss, and the turn out was about thirty people, with a lone male sitting in the back slinking sheepishly into his seat as he came to realize this discussion didn't involve an obscenities, as advertised. And I was disappointed. I talked to a few friends and ended up having a long discussion about the panel and what it had changed about our views when I realized that we hadn't broken any new ground for others, we were already self-proclaimed feminists who didn't need any convincing.

So I pondered. For months. This morning, I read an article about Michelle Obama and the perceptions of black women in America, Aunt Jemima stereotypes and all. I started thinking about the ideology of Women of Color feminism, and just couldn't take the silence around campus anymore. I started planning. And emailing. And waiting.

So for now, I'm just checking my email obsessively, hoping for any response from the 20 professors I contacted. I finally feel like I'm practicing what I preach, and I can't wait to see what happens. Stay tuned.